May 29, 2016

Lifetime Movie Network Recap: The Maid



Folks, there is no nice way to word what is on my mind. Lifetime is totally fucking with yours truly.

Sorry Cap. 
#butthefuckeryisreal

I am not sure if the executives at Lifetime are simply angry with my "assuming the Lifetime position" references, sick of my disdain for the Lifetime Police Department or fed up with my pandering to the Lifetime "ewww" factor (i.e., Grandpappy's playing hide the polish sausage in the rye bread with teenage babysitting hookers). 

But, BUT, Saturday night's Lifetime movie "The Maid" was really just some, well:

May 26, 2016

When Ratchets Attack, Or A Walmart Supercenter Story



As you all know, Military Husband and I moved. This, and a myriad of other reasons that derailed on the excuse train a month ago, is the reason why I have been absent from the blogging world. 

Moving is totally super fun. Every single day of the moving process had me pretty much like:


You know, the usual.

May 15, 2016

Lifetime Movie Network Recap: I Didn't Kill My Sister



If you read my last post Well You Movin' On Up: Moving Guide For Ratchets, you know that Military Husband and I moved. Not only have we been busy with said move, but I have been adjusting to making the big switch to Direct TV.

The DVR features and channel numbers are different and I have to search for my movies and um, uh:


Any excuse to run away from the albatross that is Lifetime.

May 10, 2016

Well You Movin' On Up: Moving Guide For Ratchets



Military Husband and I recently moved. Not a "PCS" move mind you, but a TCH, also known as temporary change of house. No, that is not an official military term. I made that one up all by my lonesome. Because, you know, I can. 

I can do just about anything.

I am like Buffy, but funner.

May 5, 2016

Captain America Civil War: I Could Do This All Day



Well, well, well. I have finally returned and my life changes are somewhat, kinda, sort of complete. It took a lot of alcohol and a ton of patience, but everything in Mili Wifey land is almost back to normal.

Did I tell you I needed beaucoup booze to get me through these trying times?

I shall mention it again.
Once more, with feeling.

April 19, 2016

Throwback Mili Wifey Pictures, Or I've Always Been An Attention Whore



Disclaimer: No, NO, I do not think I look like Barbie. I think I look like Ratchet Barbie, however, I could find no acceptable pictures online to use for this post. Can someone make me a Ratchet Barbie gif for my blog? I will bring you Ratchet Mall Cookies and Hostess Snowballs for LIFE.

I know, I KNOW, I never share information about my personal life. However, today I sort of, kind of will in a way. We are currently going through some "life changes" (*all good stuff*). Thus, do not be surprised if my posts are a little sparse during the next few weeks. Military Husband and I will miss you tons.

But, BUT, do not be sad.

Captain America just needs a hug, right?
And a dance with Peggy Carter.